Picking up the "poo" in life!

I finished reading My So-Called Life as a Proverbs 31 Wife a few weeks ago and she said something that made me think.

She was talking about how she was taking her dog out to go potty in their apartment complex. They had an area for dogs to go potty but that many people never picked up after their dogs and how it really bothered her.

This particular day she saw a man walking his dog and as she walked past him his dog had done it's business. She offered to get him a bag (they provided them by the trash can) and not only offered him one but picked it up for him.

She said that she wanted to serve him like Jesus, even if he didn't realize it.  She thought maybe next time she sees him she might get the chance to ask where he goes to church. She had a purpose in mind, heavenly goals!

She didn't just stop there but brought it home. That we as moms pick up poo all day long in our home. Maybe not always literally poo but there are many forms! Laundry, taxiing kids around, homework, dishes, etc., etc. We many times avoid these jobs, putting them off. She talked about how she even replaced these tasks with ministry and other "events".

She thought about her reason for picking up poo for the guy and wondered if that's not also the reason why we do those things for our families!

And then she made this statement;

"We reflect Jesus in the small things so our families can see Him in the bigger."

I also read a book on Joe Elston, from our church. A few years ago he passed away from cancer and his daughter wrote a memoir on his life. He was an amazing father and a great man of God. He wasn't on a huge platform and didn't speak from the pulpit but he considered his role in life important.

Joe was interested in helping others dreams come true.
Joe was invested in his children and raising them to serve God.

It really challenged me on how my children will see me when they grow up. Will I pick up "poo" for my children and consider it a blessing to do so? Knowing it's for a bigger purpose?

Do you feel alone even in a crowded room?

I recently read the book My So Called Life as a Proverbs 31 Wife. I enjoyed the book. I thought the author was quite funny in her quest for being a Proverb 31 Wife. How she fell short in so many ways but in the end shows you that it's what works for your family that makes you who you are.

Anyway, at one point in her book her family had just moved to a new city and she hadn't really met anyone yet. Her only interaction with other woman was in the office. She goes on to tell how as a child she had moved around a lot and it became easier to throw relationships away and replace it with activity. To-do lists and accomplishments. She made this statement, "I think loneliness hits too many of us more than we are willing to admit." Well Amen sister all by myself!

She remembered a conversation about the very thing with a friend in the town they had just moved from. They were two woman sitting together, having lunch and yet they still felt the weight of loneliness!

I don't know about you but I have many times been in a room crowded with other women and still feel completely alone!

I thought it was interesting how she said it was easy to replace friendships with to-do lists. If we keep busy, even if it's activities for our kids and family we don't have to think of ways to develop friendships, which I think, at least for me, can be very difficult.

Growing up I had the same experience. For whatever reason (we were not a military family) we moved every two years. And because of that I had to change schools every two years as well. By the time I got into Jr. High I had been to four different grade schools. It may not have been that many but for me as a kid, it became harder and harder to meet friends. I became very quiet and shy. Even as I got older it was tough to go up to just introduce myself. I to this day have to push away my insecurities to step up and put myself out there for others to get to know me!

But God wants us to have friendship! He created us for friendship with others! Even in Hebrews 10:25 he says; Let us not give up meeting together, as some are in the habit of doing, but let us encourage one another--and all the more as you see the Day approaching.

I was then reading another book Don't Sweat The Small Stuff and it happened to be on Bosom Buddy's. She told a story about how she went with a friend (her bosom buddy) to an appointment together to support each other. They were able to laugh their way through something that was uncomfortable for them do to alone. She encouraged that each of us need that buddy, someone to lean on.

Now I know as moms this can be tough. We legitimately are busy. It's not just to-do lists. We have kids to run around a house to keep in order. We truly have "stuff" to get done. Our lives are so busy! I don't have much time to run out and have "girl time". But I am trying to challenge myself to step out and put myself out there!

I want to become a good friend to the friends I already have. I want them to go beyond the surface. I want to get to know others. Let's put our to-do list aside and invest in girlfriends!

A Diagnosis!

I saw this and thought it was cute!!!

What if's, Should have's, Could have's

As mom's, at least for me, I sometimes dwell on what could have been, what I should have done or what could have happened. They can come in many forms. From something I said, to a decision I made to what could have happened good or bad by something that I did. This is true for us as moms but also as women. With our busy schedules it's going to happen.

In our young marrieds class last week we discussed what it means to be a re-player. I am the queen of re-playing! Now I could be wrong but I don't think that is something I can change. I re-play things in my mind. I go over it and consider what happened. Whether it was a good or bad thing. I re-play a conversation. I re-play a fun moment that I had with someone. I re-play things I said to to others, etc. BUT...we also discussed how this can be damaging. When you dwell on things you then create a feeling for that person or situation that you create as a false truth.

I can sometimes replay things that could have happened, how the kids could have gotten hurt when I wasn't watching them climb or how I shouldn't have yelled like that. It then affects how I parent. I am too afraid to let them be kids for fear of them being hurt (not that there isn't caution) or next time I let them get away with something because I over did it the last time. This is not constructive. I can't live in What if, Should have or Could have's.

Psalm 139
¹ You have searched me, LORD,
and you know me.
² You know when I sit and when I rise;
you perceive my thoughts from afar.
³ You discern my going out and my lying down;
you are familiar with all my ways.
⁴ Before a word is on my tongue
you, LORD, know it completely.
⁵ You hem me in behind and before,
and you lay your hand upon me.
⁶ Such knowledge is too wonderful for me,
too lofty for me to attain.

God know's everything, he knows your thoughts, your heart, your motives. We all make mistakes and God loves us. What I need to learn is how to make things different the next time around. If I'm afraid they could get hurt, I give perimeters that make me comfortable and the kids get to play. If I over yelled I can sit them down and apologize that I'm sorry I over reacted. I can talk to them about how they need to listen or decide on a different consequence that you can use the next time the situation comes up.

God doesn't want us to dwell in the past. He wants us to learn and grow. Just as we are learn and grow in Christ, so we are in all areas of our life, growing and changing. Thank God for his grace as we also give grace to others as well as ourselves!

I saw this picture a few days after I wrote this and thought it was a great one, I had to add it to my post!

The Mundane

Life can be mundane. We live in a society of instant pleasure. From fast food, microwaves, to instant t.v. with out commercials! It's hard for us to sometimes just sit. Things are passing us by and we feel we need to join the race. The day in day out can get old. Laundry, picking up the house, doing the dishes...again! We finish a project feel some sort of progress to get up the next day and start over. Many times doing the exact same things we did the day before.

Sometimes I catch myself looking forward to the next activity. Sunday church, Wens night classes, a sports activity, grocery shopping, an event that we've been looking forward to for a few weeks or so. We plan for the next days ahead, preparing, counting down days. All the while forgetting to focus on the present.

Today you have the chance to enjoy life, to love more, to grow more. To teach your children, enjoy the small moments. I sometimes stop when the kids and me are in the car or at the table just laughing at something and think; "These are the moments I want to remember."

We see our kids always wanting to grow up and we think or even say "Enjoy being a kid while you can." For those that are married we say to those looking for a spouse "Enjoy being single while you can." For those waiting for a baby we say; "Enjoy your sleep while you can." But now that I'm married, have children I feel like telling myself; "Slow down and enjoy today, while you can."

I know it's hard when your kids are little you can't wait til they are bigger and sleep through the night. Then when they are bigger and can take care of themselves. Always looking to the next stage. Time does fly and we can't get back those moments spent looking to the future. Days, weeks and months will come. Let's enjoy today, even in the mundane!!!


*Don't Sweat The Small Stuff by Kristine Carlson*

Job Opening: Mother, Mom, Mama, Mommy

Job Description: Long-term team player needed for challenging work in an often chaotic environment. Candidate must be willing to work variable hours, including evenings, weekends and frequent twenty-four hour shifts. Some overnight travel required, including trips to primitive camping sites on rainy weekends and endless sports tournaments in faraway cities. Travel expenses not reimbursed.

Skills Required: The candidate must be willing to be hated-at least temporarily- until someone needs five dollars. Must be willing to bite tongue repeatedly. Must be willing to be indespensible one minute and an embarrassment the next. Ability to treat flesh wounds a plus.

Possibility for Advancement: Virtually none. Your job is to remain in the same position for years, without complaining, while constantly retraining and updating your skills so that those in your charge can ultimately surpass you.

Wages and Compensation: You pay them! A balloon payment is due when the offspring turn eighteen because of the assumption that college will help them become financially independent. When you die, you give them whatever is left. The oddest thing is that you actually enjoy it and wish you could do more.

Benefits: While there is no healthy insurance, no pension and no paid holidays, this job supplies limitless opportunities for personal growth and free hugs for life.

*From Raising and Spiritually Strong Daughter by Susie Shellenberger*

Beauty

There is a phrase, "Beauty is in the eye of the beholder" and that is true. What is beautiful to me may not be to you and vise verse. But when society makes a standard of beauty it many time affects what I see as beauty. A new fashion comes out, one I would not have pieced together, but it is now the "style" and I begin to see it differently and in my mind it can many times become beauty to me as well.

We as women, mothers & wives struggle, at least I do, with beauty. The right figure, hair style, clothes you wear. As women we are naturally going to be into our looks as we care what our husband thinks or even what others think. We worry about dying our hair to cover the gray, clothes to flatter our figure, whether we put on a few pounds, etc. The list goes on and on.

I'm not saying we shouldn't take pleasure in taking care of ourselves. I know I feel better when I eat healthier or go to the gym. Mentally it helps me to feel good. I like to paint my nails and wear make-up. Dressing up and looking nice can be fun. But my identity is not in those things. I can get caught up in the "beauty of the world" and be sidetracked from my beauty in God.

Did you know that twenty years ago the average fashion model weighed 8% less than the average woman. Today, she weighs 23% less! Plus size is now considered between 6 & 14! No matter how much weight I lost I would always be considered "plus size." I am tall and big boned. Could you imagine me trying to loose weight to be smaller than a size 6? Um, that's not going to happen! Most standard clothing outlets cater to sizes 14 or smaller! No wonder I can never find anything to fit right! LOL...It has taken me years to be comfortable in my own skin. And yet I still struggle at times.

But remember these words in Psalm 139-13-15;

¹³ For you created my inmost being;
you knit me together in my mother’s womb.
¹⁴ I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made;
your works are wonderful,
I know that full well.
¹⁵ My frame was not hidden from you
when I was made in the secret place,
when I was woven together in the depths of the earth.

God made you and loves you just as you are. What we choose to meditate on can affect every area of your life, including how you see yourself. Yes, I may have stretch marks, I have a few extra pounds from multiple pregnancies. I have gray hair and wear glasses... BUT!
But... I am wonderfully made
But... I am beautiful in the sight of God
But... God cares what is on the inside, in my heart

When I think on these things THAT beauty can be seen on the outside. And nothing is more attractive!

Wonder Woman

My disclosure; I came across this book and thought it would be a great way to start my days. Though I love to read I have to be honest, I'm not a big non-fiction reader and I'm bad at devotions! I would like to be better. (In reading it I have figured out that it's not a Christian book but that doesn't mean it doesn't have good info.)

As moms we are still woman. Whether we work outside the home or inside the home, we are also wives, friends, daughters and more. Being a woman affects all the areas of our life. At home, work, even when we go to the store. Things can be stressful, we have time crunches, chores to get done, kids to pick up, dinner to get ready. The list goes on and on.

I thought this book fit great for me at this time. I would love to share some thoughts with you as well. I will revise and add my stories to some of the short chapters that Kristine Carlson writes.

WONDER WOMAN!

"I am Woman, I am invincible, I am tired!"

Does that fit you? I know it does me! I learned a while back that I had to cut things out of my schedule for my own sanity. I think all of us have overbooked ourselves at one time or another.

There are time when it can get busy for a season, say for t-ball. When t-ball season starts I know that for 6 weeks we will have a "season" of business. But when it's over we take a break to regroup, we don't schedule anything and enjoy doing nothing. I have learned those are okay, in moderation. They can even good time of busyness. I have great memories of the boys playing t-ball and my daughter playing soccer.

Yet, I have had long stretches of busyness as well. I worked in the nursery on Sundays at our church for 5 years. I have also served on Wens. nights for longer than that. On top of that I went MOMS group and now Bible study. Over a 5 year period of always serving (with good intentions) I felt run down! Yes, my list of involvement was impressive but inside, I was empty. I had to take a step back and realize what was important to do for me and my family. This is not my schedule any longer, I needed to change for me!

We all try to be Wonder Woman in some way. We serve everywhere we can, we never say no (unless we are already booked), or the kids are involved in everything possible so your always running, never enjoying. You have great intentions but there are a few steps Kristin Carlson mentions to help say good-bye to Wonder Woman.

1. Let go of the notion that you can do it all.

2. When you can't accomplish everything on you list, it doesn't mean your inadequate.

3. Be willing to ask for help when you need it.

Like I said yesterday I have finally realized that it's okay that I'm not a morning person, don't get up before the kids and that my house is not "perfect". I will always have things on my do-to list, no matter how much I finish but the kids will not always be here. This is only a season and then the season is gone.

Most of all #3 has been something to this day I have a hard time doing. I have the best in-laws, willing to take my kids and help out at any time but I never ask! Sometimes to my disadvantage. I need a break or help. This week I wanted to go school to help sign my daughter up for High School. It took everything in me to ask my mother-in-law to help. I feel bad asking someone else to help me so I can do something, even if it's something important! But as I get older I get better at asking and say good-bye to another piece of Wonder Woman !

Take a look today and see if there are there is a piece of Wonder Woman to say good-bye to. If you have found a balance for you and your family, that's awesome! I am still working on it everyday, sometimes I repeat my mistakes but that's okay! We are all growing and thank God that he is patient with us! Love you guys!

The Image of a Mother!

These past few days have been filled with preparation for High School for my oldest, Aryianna, who will be starting in the fall! (Talk about stressing out!) It hit me last night that she only has 4 years before she could potentially be moving on in life, out of our house and into her future! 4 years! My youngest isn't quite 4 years old yet! The comparison is just crazy. It makes me sad to realize how fast it has gone! Yes, there are others that will still be at home but that doesn't make having one go any easier! Yes it can be exciting but...well you know. I have heard for years to enjoy the early years because it goes so fast but it's amazing how you don't think about it till you see them growing...and when I look at her now I realize, time really went by fast!

I have struggled with the image of what a "House Mom, House Wife" should look like. But I think, and I say I think, I have learned that not having a clean house is not an atrocity. I have kids, things get busy. I don't have to work my fingers to the bone just to prove to myself that I can. Cause be real, who cares but me. At least in our house we don't have a constant stream of company (though if we do I like to be ready for them!) But our house is definitely "lived in".

Now I have to say that we still pick up daily, do what we need, we have our Saturday clean days but I have learned to be more flexible. Some days we have plans, so it gets moved around or skipped all together. But now I don't feel so bad for it. Right now in this season of life I will never be "on top" of everything. There will always be loose end, more to finish, another project to start. There is always laundry, dishes, dusting to be done. But there will not always be a kid to kiss, cuddle and hug. Cause even when I ask them if they will always let me hold them tight and kiss them all over; you and me know they won't. It's just how it goes.

With that I can't say that I don't dream of a clean house, everything done and I'm ahead of the game but that day may never come. Who knows. All I know is that it's not for now. So, when I can't wake up 2 hours before the kids, have devotions in, a work out in and be this cherry mother who wakes the kids up to the smell of bacon and eggs! I realize that it's okay.

Motherhood is more than I ever would have thought. Along with all the love and enjoyment of life and seeing this little person that looks like you or has your personality. Motherhood is also the hardest things physically and mentally than I could have ever dreamed. All the things you thought you'd never do to your children, you fell like you've done worse! All the things you thought you'd let your children do, you don't. You child not views you the way you did when you were a kid! They think you were never their age and had endless money on your plastic card! They tell your business to others and throw fits in the middle of the store like your on a t.v. show waiting to be Pranked!

BUT...In it all. I wouldn't trade it for the world. I would rather add more kids to my mix before I took any of it away!

Henoch-Schonlein purpura

So, I'm sure you had to look up the name to find out what in the world it is that my son had been diagnosed with! haha...Believe me, so did we! I'm sure others have wondered how we discovered this so I thought I'd give a little back ground...

Wednesday night Jayden came home from church complaining that he didn't want to walk to his room to get ready for bed. He complained that he was tired and had to run at church for class and didn't feel like it. Now if you know my son, he is the king of pain. "Go clean your room", "I can't my arm hurts sooooo bad!". So when he started complaining I could tell he was really in pain but we thought it was growing pains. We had also noticed two red dots on his leg. Stephen said they didn't look like spider bites so we didn't think anything of it.

Thursday morning Jayden got up and went to school. He said he still felt a little yucky but once he got going he seemed fine. By 11:00 his teacher told me he was complaining that he didn't feel good, looked a little pale and was complaining that his legs hurt. So I brought him home and he took a good long nap.

We had already planned to go on a camping trip and when he got up he said I feel better so we took off. He slept a little in the car and still said his arms and legs were hurting. When we arrived up to the camp grounds he wanted to just sit. It was 9:30 so we basically went to bed still thinking that it was just growing pains.

It wasn't until Friday morning we started to wonder. We got up really early and when I tried to help him dress I stood him up and he fell and said he couldn't stand. He didn't want to move his arms at all. He sat by the fire for a few hours before he went to fishing but we took a chair for him to sit in. Stephen ran to the small store and got him some medicine to give him since it didn't seem to be going away. When it started to warm up I had him take his sweater off and it took him a good 3 minutes just to get it off, he didn't want you to touch him or help. When he got it off he turned white and said he didn't feel so good. He threw up from the pain of moving his arms.

We also discovered at that time his dots had multiplied as well. This photo is when he was going home from the hospital. Some have already healed...
It was Friday around 5pm that we took him into ER because after talking to the Dr.'s nurse, he thought Jayden might have the beginning of meningitis. The meds had kicked in so he wasn't in much pain, was more chatty so we thought he might be getting better. The crazy thing was we had 3 different people looking at him and they didn't know what it was...finally a Dr. came in and diagnosed Henoch-Schonlein pupurpa (allergic purpura). At this time we had no idea what we were dealing with but they did a urine test and his kidneys came back with 1 protein (normal is 1-9) so they said he would be fine, just use meds to help with the pain, otherwise it would run it's course.

We were released and went back to the camp grounds to go to bed. Saturday morning he woke up at 4:30am sick and was sick all morning. It wasn't until about noon that he popped his head out of the tent and wanted to walk around. He would limp and not use one arm and then sat to watch everyone play. (This photo is of him watching the kids play from our tent...poor guy). We packed up camp and left just after dinner. We noticed on the way home that his hand was swollen but he seemed to be better otherwise.

Sunday morning he woke up and took a bath, ate breakfast, seemed to be better. But around lunch time he complained again of stomach pain and by dinner was sick, his knee was swollen so he was having a hard time walking, his arms hurt and he didn't want to be touched all over again. We gave him some meds again since he had gotten so bad.

When we took him in on Monday morning for the pediatric appointment. He could walk but didn't want to. I was pushing him in a wheel chair. He said he was hurting still. We had to go to the bathroom and from walking so much he got sick in the office. Before the urine test even came back the Dr. had spoken with the kidney and intestine specialist and they decided to admit him into the hospital. There was trace blood in his urine, which I hadn't even noticed.

Only a few hours after being on the steroids and IV fluids he was able to eat, keep food down and the pain was gone. It's amazing how fast he has turned around. His urine was red when we got to the hospital but that was the only time. His protein was at 100 and we will find out today where he is at since he's been home.

We had thought it would be a 6-8 week recovery but he seems to be doing better than we expected.

It is so great to see him moving around since he had been laying around for so many days. He is eating and keeping food down after not eating for days as well. At this point we have to see a kidney specialist for awhile to keep an eye on his kidneys, probably for a few years. But otherwise Jayden is doing much better.

I thank all my friends and family that prayed for my little boy.
He has made such a great turn around.
Thank you God! :)

No More Ninnies!

My 3 year old daughter has finally given up her ninnie. Well, give up probably wouldn't be the best choice! If it was up to her she would not have chosen to give it up but without realizeing it she did! Now what's a ninnie you ask? I'm talking about the "P" word, also known as a paci, chupon, suckie, the Pacifier! lol

A few weekends ago I went away for our churches Woman's Advance. I left Friday after noon and came back Sunday afternoon. My kids stayed with grandpa for the weekend. (They had so much fun). When I left my sweet 3 year old had her ninnie hanging in her mouth, like she always does.

When she left with grandpa they took the ninnie with but she never asked for it, not once! So when I came home I decided to leave the ninnie with grandpa at his house so she wouldn't have one even if she asked.

Our first night she fell asleep but then woke up crying for her ninnie. She didn't just cry but threw a fit. One of those I'm so tired I don't know what to do with myself type of cries! This has happened a few other nights in the past week or so but I have stayed strong and not given it to her. It's amazing how big of a struggle a ninnie can be.

During the day she has only asked for it a few times but for the most part she has forgotten about it. My little girl is making another step to being a big girl. Though this is a happy step. I love seeing her and hearing her talk without that ninnie in her mouth! :)

It takes a village...

Here we go again, yes another clip from The View! I already posted this clip about what mom's lie about...the 2nd half of this video is about taking a village to raise children. Here is the clip again if you want to watch it to see what they have to say about; taking a village...(it is the 2nd 1/2 of the clip, if you want to fast forward).

Hot Topics: What Do Moms Lie About?

When I went to The View website to find this clip I read this comment under this video...

It does not take a village to raise a child...

I have three children 6,8, and 17 (my kids do chores but are not responsible for each other, that is our job as the parents), full time job, part time home based business,coach two soccer teams with my husband (used to be three but too many game conflicts), a dog, a bearded dragon, my regular house chores, grad committees, dance classes, judo classes, and to top it off, I do not own a DISHWASHER....imagine having to do some hard work.

These new moms can't handle one child..they constantly whine until help comes.
People have to learn to become self sufficient and not rely on others to get them through life. This next generation is helpless...

Do you agree? I have to say when I read this, it made me mad! Growing up my mom was a single working parent raising 2 daughters (only 10 months 3 weeks apart). She had to work to support us, of course. She lived in Arizona and our entire family was in Iowa (where we from). My mom had no help of any kind. I never remember a babysitter from my childhood. We were left alone when we had to be. (Back then things were much different than now!)

When I grew up, had kids of my own I, in my own mind I have a hard time asking for help. I have always thought; these are my children and I have to do it myself. Even when I am in need of time off or have somewhere I need to be I feel guilty asking. One day I mentioned this to my mom. She laughed and said "Man, I would have LOVED help when you were little." It never crossed my mind that she may have wanted help (either from a spouse or family). I just knew she did it on her own, so I should too.

Thank goodness for my mother-in-law, who loves her grandchildren. I did not grow up with my grandparents around, so I was not used to family dynamics. I didn't have sleep overs with cousins or get to be picked up by grandparents. Though they would have loved to do those things we were states apart.

Over the years have learned to love the relationship that children can have with the grandparents, family, cousins, siblings. I have learned to ask for help (a little more). Though my mother-in-law has learned to ask to take the kids as well, since she know that I won't always do it! I can't imagine my in-laws not being around, God Blessed me with them when I had no family here with me! And has taught me so much through their relationships.

I think that a community goes beyond a family as well. Churches, schools and teachers all help our children grow. Our children are being shaped, molded and they growing into adults that go out into a larger village (outside the home) to help the next generation. How can't a village be involved!?

What are your thoughts? Do you think it takes a village to raise children?

What Do Moms Lie About?

Have you ever lied about your children to other moms? I got this topic again from The View. On the same day they had quite a few interesting topics! The link below is a video of the list of things that they say mom's have lied about, take a look...(It's 2mins 15sec...about 1min 45 sec is the clip I'm talking about.)

The View | Video | Hot Topics: What Do Moms Lie About?

I have to say that I have never lied about what my kids do, I really haven't. I've never tried to act like my kids were something they weren't. Whether good or bad. When they were a baby or even now. But I have compared my kids to other children and often bragged about them to others. Haven't all moms? From our labor stories to the development of your children for the first year; sitting, walking, talking. We compare as if it has a bearing on our parenting skills.

Well, here is my children in a nut shell; My first labor was almost 24 hour long! My kids never slept through the night as babies, in fact many of them still get up to come in my room in the middle of the night! My kids took until 2 years old to get all their teeth, my last one was 3 years old before she got her last two "I" teeth! They waited until they were 1 year old and one was 14 months before he walked. They all take their time but eventually all get there.

Things to feel guilty about??? I have left my kid in a dirty diaper, let them cry themselves to sleep, thought my kids were better behaved, yelled at them when I shouldn't have and have made sandwiches for dinner because I didn't want to cook...Nope, I'm not super mom!

But One thing I confess I was the queen of is... "My kids will never":

Mine will never... take off their shoes when we are out of the house (in the car or at church) so that we have to wait for them to get them back on before we can go in to the store...well, they do.

Mine will never...look dirty...well, we have many times looked like we just rolled out of bed!
Mine will never...throw a fit in the store...I remember a time when I walked through the store shopping while my child wailed (I had to shop, it was the only time I had) and they wanted to throw a fit, I just ignored them! Much to the stares of others! lol

Mine will never...sleep with me...HAHA...they still do! I don't care!

Mine will never...have a pacifier past a certain age...My 3 year old still has hers!


We all have been there...if our kids are loved and know it, who cares!!! Don't you agree!!!??? :)

Do you want to be a mom?

I sat down to watch The View the other day. It happened to be the day that a mom was on talking about how she didn't want to be a mom. It was an interesting topic and quite controversial. The link below is her interview on The View, it's about 7 minutes long.

http://www.feministpress.org/news-events/rahna-reiko-rizzuto-today-show

I remember about 12 years ago I realized I just wanted to be a wife, mom and have lots of kids. Now being a mother of five, it is very hard for me to imagine leaving my children. I can barely ask for help to have someone watch them so I can go out and do something on my own. I miss them and want the with me.

This particular mom said at one point in her interview that she loved her kids but not in the middle of the night when they were sick. For me those are the times I love. Not the kids being sick or having to clean it up but the part of taking care of them. Of course you hate the lack of sleep but the moment when your child needs you and wants you to take care of them is the part that fills my heart with the joy of motherhood, the bonding with your child at times that others don't get.

Listening to her, I do logically understand. I know woman deserve lives of their own. We have ambitions, goals, dreams. I recently read a book by Joyce Meyer called; Any Minute. (You can see my full blog on my coffee corner page about the book - it is a fiction story). The mother in this book was working her way up the corporate ladder and in the mean time loosing her family because she invested more time at work that with her husband and children. It took a horrific accident for her to slow down. She didn't quit working, didn't become a full time mom but in the end she learned to balance her work life with her family and the way she treated people changed.

They mention in this interview how; if it was a man it wouldn't be an issue but because it was a woman it's controversial. What are your thoughts?

I think I come back to these questions; At what cost are things worth it? When you get to the top of the ladder and your alone is it worth it? I really do think that what works for one doesn't work for all but relationships are part of the Christian life...where is the balance?

Am I the only mom?

I was talking to a friend, a mom, the other night and she asked me if I ever get a break! Well, yes and no. I mean I get my moments through out the day, I sit and veg and make the kids play in their rooms, I'm sitting at the computer writing this blog (with only one kids home). I even left my oldest daughter to watch her siblings while I went to coffee with a friend that came in town with her new baby. Oh, don't forget, I also have after they go to bed...but I'm usually tired by then! There isn't many true "breaks". And the coffee breaks happen far and few between.

When my mom came to visit for 7 days she said she didn't know how I get anything done. My school schedule is way more tame this year (so happy about that). But she said you don't get time alone and your so busy. I remember she had just mopped the front entry while I ran to get my son from school. We came in the door, he kicked off his shoes and sand flew all over the freshly mopped floor. I just busted out laughing and said; "That's why I don't clean!"

Woman are not like men, at least it is this way for me. I don't get to call up a girlfriend and say "Hey, you wanna get together, right now?" As a mom, I can't just drop what I'm doing and run out the door. I have so many things to consider, is my husband going to be home? Is there any other activity happening already? How long will I be gone? What time of day is it; nap time, time to pick up kids or bed time? I'm a planner, I have to schedule coffee dates, scrapbook nights, time to go to the store! It makes it a lot harder to invest in friendships with five others at home to consider.

When I was talking to my friend the other night I told her that I don't mind. I am being honest when I say that, I really don't mind. My dream was to be a mommy, to have lots of kids. I wouldn't have it any other way. I love motherhood...

BUT, I would be lying if I said I don't want a break every now and then or sometimes more than that! I am looking forward to our Women's Advance coming up in September, which I have not gone to in 2 years! I will be gone for 2 days!!! I get lonely as a mom since the only conversation I have on a daily basis is with children and would love an adult conversation! Am I the only mom? I don't think so...

Only a short while after talking to my one friend about motherhood I talked to another friend, also a mom, who is feeling the loneliness of friendship, just like me. I realized that my friend who lives near me and another friend states apart from me both feel the same. We, as moms, miss friendships.

Is it something we have to give up as moms? I see other mom's that have BFF's and hang out but maybe it's not my season right now. This is the time in my life when I invest in my kids. But I don't want to loose me in the process.

I think there needs to be a balance. Knowing I'm not alone helps but making sure I plan getting away when I can helps a lot. Tell me, Am I the only mom???

Chore Charts

My mother say's she called our chore chart growing up, "The Musty Dusty Cleaning". I don't remember it, though I do remember having chores. I can't tell you what they were but it's a part of growing up, whether you like it or not. And here I am, all grown up still having chores and now trying to teach my kids!

With 5 children my house is not company worthy 99% of the time! I love that feeling when that 1% arrives but it is always so short lived. My kids are pretty good about putting things away but they are kids and have to be reminded. Everyone complains or has excuses, so...

One day I was tired of the messes, tired of repeating myself on what to do every day. It's amazing how you can do the same thing every day yet no one remembers what it was! So I sat down on the computer looked up chore charts and created my own. When I was done I printed it out, put it on the fridge and showed all the kids. They each have their name, color and chore lists. I was pretty excited. Here is just two of the kids chore lists. They all look the same but the chores vary.It's been a few weeks of using our lists and I am in love with our chore charts. I wonder why I never had them before now! I don't have to follow them around. All I have to say is, "Go read your list" and they do. They can see what they need to do and when. I even made a Saturday chore list. Each of them has a chore list based on their age and what they are capable of doing. This past week I was gone on Saturday morning. I didn't get home until lunch time and they all surprised me by having their chores done before I got home! Had the list not been there that would never have happened!
Things run so much smoother now. Next project, How to get boys to clean together and not play!!! LOL. It's always something!

Giving up the toddler beds

My oldest daughter, Aryianna got new bedding for Christmas and got a new bedroom in January. At the time we took down her day bed, stored it in the garage to put her new loft bed up. At the time I was not prepared to let go of the toddler beds in the younger girls room, so they stayed.

Now six months later, my daughter Akayla-Joy was outgrowing her toddler bed and I realized it was time. This past Saturday I got up the energy to not only clean and organize their room but pulled out the day bed, put it together and pulled out the toddler beds to the garage this time.

If your like me, your sentimental. I hang on to things that have meaning. I love the little things and hate change. I wanted my girls to have their toddler beds for as long as they could because it's the last time I will have toddler beds in the house. But as they all grown and I see the changes and have time to accept them, I realize the next faze is just as great as the one previously.

I am in love with their room now. Though Alaya is only going to be 3 in June and they are both small for their new "big girl" bed, it's perfect for them to share. As they grow up we have a trundle so they can add a mattress. But again, lets not jump ahead...one step at a time for me! LOLEvery day I'm reminded in something little that the kids are getting bigger. The school year is ending which means they are now entering the next grade, they say something I don't expect or I notice they are taller when their pants are all of a sudden too short!

I just have to take a deep breathe and embrace the changes as they come!

Mother's Day

I really enjoyed my Mother's Day this year. We didn't do anything extravagant, my kids didn't get me any big present. I got the best gift, a day spent with my family. My oldest daughter woke me up and made me breakfast in bed; scrambled eggs and English muffins! So sweet.

The week before they were all bringing home gifts from church and school of things that they had made, asking if they could show me. I kept telling them to wait, I wanted to be surprised on Mother's Day. So finally the day came and they were all so excited running to their rooms to get all their goodies and bring them to me.

My oldest daughter had made me cards, she loves to make cards. She has gotten the scrap booking bug from her mom! Jaylen made a growing flower with his photo and a caterpillar magnet. Jayden gave me a silver box and sang me a song; If I had a box to put my mommy in...it was super cute. Inside he was so excited for me to get an oreo cookie (he knows mommy loves chocolate!) He also made me flowers (ones that will never die, haha). Akayla-Joy made me a poster with her hands and a flower magnet. Even Alaya had made me a card with the help of her big sister. (Sorry the picture is sideways, it's not on my computer but turns when uploaded!)

They are the best gifts, ones that took time to make and thought put into them.

We spent the day at my in-laws hanging out. My favorite thing, hanging with family. I'm so proud to be a mommy of five. I am asked all the time how do you do it? And I think...I couldn't imagine my life any other way.

My Family

My mom, from Arizona and my sister, from Georgia came to visit me this past week. I had not seen my mom in about a year and half or my sister in about 5 years. My sister and me grew up together and the first time we were separated was when I moved away after I graduated from High School. Since then we've only seen each other 6 times in a 14 year time span. And those 6 times vary from 20 minutes in an airport layover on my way through to another destination to 6 days.

It's hard to hear about how some families live in the same town and never see each other or that having family functions are so much work. What I wouldn't give to have the opportunity to see my family or everyone get together at least once a year!

Growing up I didn't have a big family and we didn't live near extended family either. So the thought of having a big family was my dream. Thus why I wanted more than a few children!

I have gotten used to not seeing my family or being around them on a regular basis since I was a kid. It is what it is. It's never been easy and now as a mom, it only seems harder. When you finally get together the time goes way to fast and saying good-bye is way too hard because you don't know when the next time will be. My son Jaylen cried the entire car ride home because he had to say good-bye. He's just like his mama!

It is hard to imagine my children growing up and moving away from me. I can't bear to think of it now. Yet if God calls them somewhere else, I know I will have to let them go. Times like this past week with my family help remind me how important family is and to make the most of every moment. Make them count. Enjoy each others company. One day they will all be grown and out of the house and I will miss the noise, and maybe even the messes they make to show that they are here. I want to make memories with them to remember for tomorrow!

Oh, those 2 year olds!

Have you ever tried to put a two year old to bed? Now I have 5 kids and each one has had their turn of trying to get out of bed and stay up late. Some still do even as they have gotten older. Then I have the few that actually fall asleep as soon as their head hits the pillow and they don't get up til morning.

NOT my two year old. I think it's part of the two year old phase. I love babies. They are so cute, fun to hold, dress. I love watching them learn all new things, smiling, rolling, walking. But I also love the two year old stage when they are so little and talk so much, learning new words and copying everyone. Like little people.

But I do not like putting a two year old to bed. I always hated transitioning from a play pin/crib to a toddler bed. When they are in a play pin or crib they are stuck. They can cry but eventually they realize I might as well go to bed. Once they hit that toddler bed, they are free!

Just when I think I have a routine down, my two year old decides to change it on me. Especially if you change your schedule, stay out late or no nap. So many factors can make a big difference in a two year olds life.

It amazes me how much you can love your little child but also how utterly frustrating such a task as bed time can be! I will get so upset and see her melting from exhaustion and finally pick her up and let her lay in my lap and she is out in two seconds.

As I stare at her face my frustration melts turns my love boils to the surface. It's amazing how peaceful they look when they are asleep. I see how big she has gotten, how fast she is growing and realize she is the baby getting so big and one day I will not be able to hold her like this. I kiss her on her face, watch her crinkle her nose and enjoy her for a moment. One day the "terrible two's" will be gone and new "frustrations" will take the place of bed time. But the one thing that will always stay the same is that it is all worth it!