These past few days have been filled with preparation for High School for my oldest, Aryianna, who will be starting in the fall! (Talk about stressing out!) It hit me last night that she only has 4 years before she could potentially be moving on in life, out of our house and into her future! 4 years! My youngest isn't quite 4 years old yet! The comparison is just crazy. It makes me sad to realize how fast it has gone! Yes, there are others that will still be at home but that doesn't make having one go any easier! Yes it can be exciting but...well you know. I have heard for years to enjoy the early years because it goes so fast but it's amazing how you don't think about it till you see them growing...and when I look at her now I realize, time really went by fast!
I have struggled with the image of what a "House Mom, House Wife" should look like. But I think, and I say I think, I have learned that not having a clean house is not an atrocity. I have kids, things get busy. I don't have to work my fingers to the bone just to prove to myself that I can. Cause be real, who cares but me. At least in our house we don't have a constant stream of company (though if we do I like to be ready for them!) But our house is definitely "lived in".
Now I have to say that we still pick up daily, do what we need, we have our Saturday clean days but I have learned to be more flexible. Some days we have plans, so it gets moved around or skipped all together. But now I don't feel so bad for it. Right now in this season of life I will never be "on top" of everything. There will always be loose end, more to finish, another project to start. There is always laundry, dishes, dusting to be done. But there will not always be a kid to kiss, cuddle and hug. Cause even when I ask them if they will always let me hold them tight and kiss them all over; you and me know they won't. It's just how it goes.
With that I can't say that I don't dream of a clean house, everything done and I'm ahead of the game but that day may never come. Who knows. All I know is that it's not for now. So, when I can't wake up 2 hours before the kids, have devotions in, a work out in and be this cherry mother who wakes the kids up to the smell of bacon and eggs! I realize that it's okay.
Motherhood is more than I ever would have thought. Along with all the love and enjoyment of life and seeing this little person that looks like you or has your personality. Motherhood is also the hardest things physically and mentally than I could have ever dreamed. All the things you thought you'd never do to your children, you fell like you've done worse! All the things you thought you'd let your children do, you don't. You child not views you the way you did when you were a kid! They think you were never their age and had endless money on your plastic card! They tell your business to others and throw fits in the middle of the store like your on a t.v. show waiting to be Pranked!
BUT...In it all. I wouldn't trade it for the world. I would rather add more kids to my mix before I took any of it away!
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